The Tree

I prefer restored and repurposed things over brand-new.  I don't know why?  Maybe because I've been restored, redeemed.  That's not to say that I don't like new things, especially one-of-a-kind new.  Case in point, my tree.  It's a spiral staircase at the restored bank building in Goree, which happens to be the ice office.  Watching the process from nothing to something was a blast.  Especially since the artist, David Awalt, had creative license and I didn't know what it was until it was. 

The whole reason I'm even thinking of the tree today is because of the roped handrail.  The handrail, stiles and vines came in straight, long pieces of round steel.  It took him endless hours to beat the roped sticks into a curved, spiraled, perfect handrail.  Before the wooden treads were added, I watered a concrete tree.  The artist said,

"you will know when to stop" and I did.  The water I sprayed on the 7th day no longer absorbed, but rolled right off.

Now, back to that handrail.  I'm reminded of the verse, 1 Cor 9:27 "But I beat down my body, and bring it into subjection."  Lately I've been praying these verses, Eph 4:26-27 "Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." and Mt 16:23 “Get behind me, Satan!"  I feel failure when I wake up the next morning still mad as a hornet.  What am I doing wrong, UGH!  I don't think THIS beating myself up is what Paul had in mind.

Selftalk, "My prayers ARE powerful, I just have TWO enemies."  Satan flees immediately when I pray, I stand on that fact.  It's the Flesh, Jer 17:9, that still needs convincing.  So, I go all 1Cor9:27 MMA on myself as a faith declaration.  I beat every anger verse I can find, into my thick skull

HOPING my emotions match up with my motions.  With each blow, I'm reminding myself that (Bam) this IS the direction we are going and (Boom) we are NOT quitting until we get there (Bing) because unattended anger grows grudges and (Bang) that's a devil's playground.

How do I know when to stop?  The Artist said, "you'll know."  I did because on the day that crud sprayed me down it no longer absorbed, but rolled right off.                    

Rake It Off

Sunrise Walk: they raked clean the beaches, constantly. So, to see trash there was unusual. As I took this pic, this song played. "Haunted by ghosts that live in my past, bound up in shackles of all my failures...you are (I am) redeemed. Oh child, lift up your head. Then I remember, oh God, You're not done with me, yet. Shake off these heavy chains and wipe away every stain. I am redeemed."

Later on the drive home, when we went through a certain town it washed up some trash in my mind that I had to rake away...I am redeemed! #playlist #shuffle #holymoment — in Montego Bay, Jamaica.

Act Of War

John 3:16 proves that the cross was an act of love.  But, have you ever considered the cross as an ACT of WAR?  I hadn't given it much thought until I laid eyes on Jill's wooden walk cross in the shape of a sword.  Then, I married these two verses...

John 1:14 "The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us."

Eph 6:17 "...the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God."

Therefore,... the Word is Jesus, the Word is the Sword, Jesus is the Sword.

I've always known Jesus defeated Satan in the desert with the written Sword Word, so why hadn't I ever, ever, ever imagined God defeated Satan with a Sword Word in His Hand named Jesus.  In that case, Luke 23:45 doesn't surprise me. Luke says, "And the curtain of the temple was torn in two."  It doesn't catch me off-guard anymore or shock me because in the same moment Jesus whispered, "it's finished" in verse 46, God ripped the Sword out of the heart of the earth AND the gut of Satan.  Satan is as good as graveyard dead, not JESUS, Satan!  And he knows he's bleeding out!

And by the way, he hates you and me.  He sneaks in, out, and around us whispering defeat.  But, he is a dead-dog liar.  Do you wanna kick him in the very teeth that he lied through? Revelation 12:11 says "They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony."  Stick it to him, SHARE YOUR GOD STORY!  Don't ever shut up till Jesus comes, he won't.

It's dark and it's getting darker...

As Christians, how ARE we going to make a difference in light of the Supreme Court's decision on gay marriage? Come out? Speak up?  We are, but they get mad and mad people don't listen. 

In one respect, I think with great compassion we need to tell 'our' life-changing stories.  Especially if we have been redeemed from a stronghold, specifically homosexual sin. 

^{Luke 16:29} “Abraham replied, ‘They have Moses and the Prophets; let them listen to them.’
³⁰ “‘No, father Abraham,’ he said, ‘but if someone from the dead goes to them, they will repent.’
³¹ “He said to him, ‘If they do not listen to Moses and the Prophets, they will not be convinced even if someone rises from the dead.’”

Based on that scripture, they may not even listen to someone who has come back from spiritual death of homosexuality.  I don't think that means we give up.  We need to share and be ready to keep sharing our stories, because the Holy Spirit will draw them back. 

You might be saying, I'm just going to stay out of it.  And I get it, HONESTLY, sharing THAT story is absolutely frightening. Even though you are completely healed, delivered and whole, it still feels like you are coming out of the closet.  And for that matter, everyone you tried to protect won't be protected anymore.  Pride in the form of self preservation has to die.  The Lord will protect your loved ones.  And as Beth Moore says, those lost in sin are worth it.  And I'll add, Father God is worth it.  Look at what He did for us, He was and is our Knight in shining armor.  He rescues. 

 His mercy ALWAYS comes running.

So, You're Gay? I wish we could talk, cuz I really do care...

It’s been exhausting, hasn’t it?  Living two lives…being one person within this setting and another in that.  How did it end up like this?  How could something feel so right and be wrong?  You know and love God, what happened?  How could that oxymoron be?  You may have even scoured scripture searching for a loophole.

At first, it was easy.  No one suspected anything.  Maybe you didn’t realize that when that “one person” called you at work that your tone of voice, length and breadth of the conversation was ‘different’, even with code names and words. 

You bravely confided in that one strong, Christian friend who would never condemn.  That person went with you to gain counsel from leadership.  The obvious was lovingly stated, “It’s sin”.  The solution, stop it.  Stop it?  Yes, and avoid it.  Avoid it?  You sorta were and it still snuck in the back door.  You NEVER dreamed you’d fall into this pit.  It was and never has been on your radar screen.  Stop it, avoid it.  Do you want to?  No.  Can you, even?  Strangely,………no.     

Which leads to co-workers who love you just asking a simple question and your defensiveness was likely a dead giveaway.  With the monopoly of your time and exclusivity, your other roommates wonder and ask. “Is there something going on between the two of you?”  Oh man, “No!”  Now you’ve gone and lied, again, again and again. 

You love your family and friends and you would never deliberately hurt them.  Which hurt is worse, the lie or the truth?  Yes, the truth would obliterate.  Therefore, you isolated from them and created another world where life like that could exist without lies.

Inwardly, you jumped up and down at the decision of the Court on June 26th 2015.  You admire those who outwardly celebrate, but you can’t.  You have permitted both worlds to coexist.  Social media made perfect sense at the time, keep in touch with all my loved ones at a safe distance, with much discretion. 

Uh oh, the court’s decision has just REALLY complicated things.  Participating would mean both worlds have to collide.  Wow, I don’t know…!?  We NOW have a huge personal decision, are we going to commit to each other through marriage?  Marriage?  Marriage!  Wait, sex outside of marriage is wrong.  What?  Wait!  Hold on.

“Oh, God!  Oh, myyyy God!  What am I going to do?”  Whoa, did I just pray or was that just a random expression of emotion? 
 

“Ummmm, Lord?  Down deep, I know you love me and there was, is, never will be anything that makes you love me more or less.  I want to want out.  The only thing I’m sure about right now…the one thing I know that I know that I know, You are Love.”

I am no Jailbird

I've visited a prison lately.  Had someone tell me the ins and outs of going.  Guess I was nervous cuz I didn't see 'any' of the signs posted all over the place with rules and guidelines until many, many visits later.

That first time, I tried to study the person in front of me to make sure I was 'doing' things right.  I was a nervous wreck.  Innocently, I spill my change on the table and ask for help from my inmate in diggin' out the quarters for the vending machine.  You wanna see someone nervous, you should have seen him shove that money back at me and turbo assist me put it back in my clear ziplock bag.  I didn't know they weren't suppose to even touch the money.

I people watch to the 'n th' degree.  Time has passed and I've been many times...and...while thinkin' I'm an old pro, I get denied a visit until I go and change my shirt!  My shoulders are showing thru slits in my hawaiin blouse that I had JUST WORN TO CHURCH!  I submissively went to the truck stop and bought a $3 t-shirt.  How embarrassing!  Let's see, what else have I done?!  Oh you don't even wanna know...

Somehow in the mix, I've learned that there is a manual with ALL the rules and regs for visitors.  That's a fine how-do-ya-do at this point in the game.  Hmmm...

Well, there is also a manual for life, too...if we'd read it then we be thoroughly equipped for every good work known to man.  Now, that's freeing...

What was I thinkin'...

There’s a point in The Help when the editor and writer exchange thoughts over the phone.  The writer exclaims, “You told me to write about something I believe in, something wrong that nobody notices…”  She saw what so many of her peers were blind to…lack of civility.  And talk about blind… 

After allowing the youth group to watch it tonight…I think I should be pegged as one who doesn’t notice cussing much.  Cuz it was in there more than once and I had that gut check in the presence of those young minds.  I’ve watched it thrice.  My thoughts...it moved me, it’s got a good message, it’s historical and fairly clean.  I thought the ‘S’ word was the only major cuss word.  And the incident was a prime example of repaying evil for evil, what NOT to do.  Surely, it can be redeemed with reference to the sexual purity speech in regards to the Poop Brownie Story from the week prior.  I never dreamed I’d see the infamous quote, although dawned with *&%$ explicative, on societal posts. 

I may get called in the principal’s…orrrr…pastor’s office, rather.  Pray for me and my detrimental impact on this generation…

I need ‘Help’.

Little Things

• Made supper!  Recipe called for two and a fourth cup of milk and THAT's exactly what was in the jug. 
• Chattering with Lil K'ers about airbag laws and why they couldn't sit in the front seat.  And kids called them rules to be followed.  Lil K taught about rules and laws that day.  Exact verbage.
•  HE's just enough, always on time and ever into the details.